What is a Relationship?
What is a relationship and more importantly, how is a relationship
defined? First, let us look at how a relationship is defined. Two people
are drawn together through purposes that have a common interest. At
this point, it is not known if their initial contact will grow into a
deeper connection. As the two people come together on different
occasions, they both are gathering vital information about one another.
This is a stage of just simply getting to know one another.
As time progresses the two people become more familiar with one another,
and at this point the relationship is formed. Now keep in mind, just
because a relationship is formed, it does not mean that the relationship
is bonding or that it is a relationship of substance. It just means
that the two individuals have some familiarity and have become more
acquainted with one another. So what is a relationship indicative of as
it relates to substance? A relationship of substance means that
definition has been established and both parties have determined that
they want more than just to be acquaintances.
Definition is important because the two people need to be on the same
page so that each will have an understanding of how to relate to one
another in the relationship. Sometimes people fall into traps thinking
that their relationship with a person is more than what it actually is.
Assumption can lead to hurt feelings, confusion, and could possibly
eradicate future involvement. Many people assume that they are connected
to a person in a certain way, only to find that the other individual
does not think of them in that way at all. Definition, is just simply
clarification.
I should note that each party in the relationship is responsible for
their own behavior. That being said, if the relationship is not a
relationship of substance, then it is important not to do things that
suggest that the relationship is more than what it actually is. In other
words, don't lead a person to think that the relationship is more than
what you actually want it to be. We must ask ourselves, "What is a
relationship to me"; because some people take the term relationship very
lightly. You don't meet a person one day, and decide the next day that
this person is a quality individual that I need to have in my life;
because we all put our best foot forward when we meet a new person. But
in order to truly see a person's true colors, it is important to spend
time observing their character.
Character is one of the foundational elements that should be considered
when determining whether or not the individual will add value to your
life, or deduct from it. However, to truly understand what a
relationship is from your perspective is to define what quality traits
you deem valuable in a person that you wish to spend your time with. A
mature person takes the time to know themselves and what they want in a
relationship; so that when they find those quality traits in a person
they are able to identify them and look beyond the exterior and choose
wisely.
My advice to you today is to get an understanding with the person that
you have started spending quality time with. Find out where you are with
that person, and how they view you. This will help you to know if the
relationship is of substance, or if they are simply an acquaintance.
